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Text. Love. Power.: Celebrity Relationship Expert Vanessa Taylor Interview
Vanessa Taylor, author of Text. Love. Power.: The Ultimate Girls Relationship Guide for Texting and Dating in the New Millennium, is a celebrity relationship expert and international authority on what makes men pursue women. She specializes in coaching single women and single mothers on dating, relationships and engagements. Her Platinum Girl Celebrity Blog analyzes celeb romances to discover what famous women do to get and keep their lovers, while also dissecting the mistakes that lead to heartbreak.
Feather Magazine: The idea of your book, Text.Love.Power. is genius. How has technology changed the dating game?
Vanessa Taylor: The instant communication texting allows has destroyed a lot of traditional dating. Men use text to chat with women more so than to ask for dates. Both become addicted to the constant interaction. There is hardly any space between communications making it harder for a man to build desire for a woman. People are getting to know each other over text, not on dates. Because of this, a lot of relationships don’t get off the ground.
FM: What is the biggest mistake girls make in relationships?
VT: It’s being too available for a man. When I advise women to stop texting, they become incredibly uncomfortable. They worry their man will find someone else if she doesn’t constantly validate his interest. But, if a man must have you, ignoring some of his texts won’t deter him. He’ll wonder what you’re up to. Rest assured he’ll find a way to contact you.
FM: What is the most important rule in dating?
VT: Don’t initiate with a man. Don’t strike up a conversation first, don’t introduce yourself first, don’t ask him out on a date because he’s shy. If you do, it’s as good as over or he’ll never treat you as well as the man who approaches you from across the room and must have you. Additionally, don’t talk to men too much between dates. The communication should be from him about setting up plans. Get the next date. Don’t talk about your day or ask about his. He’s not a girlfriend!
FM: If you could choose one dating rule for everyone to follow, what would it be?
VT: Stop wasting time in bad relationships and don’t be afraid of being alone.
FM: Your blog is great. What gave you the idea to start The Platinum Girl Celebrity Blog?
VT: I am a dating coach for The Rules: Time-Tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right. In order to learn The Rules, the authors recommend that their coaches watch celebrity relationships. This created the blog because women track celebrity relationships and frequently discuss them. Using celebrities is a great way to learn “The Rules.”
FM: What can regular people learn from celebrity relationships?
VT: That they make the same mistakes non-celebrities which can easily be rectified using the principles that I teach in Text. Love. Power. and those found in The Rules.
FM: Which celebrities handle their relationships best?
VT: Jessica Seinfeld, Beyoncé, Reese Witherspoon, Angelina Jolie and Amanda Seyfried.
FM: Which celebrities fail in relationships and why?
VT: Jennifer Aniston, Kim Kardashian and Jessica Simpson. They’re awful with boundaries, talk too much, hearts on their sleeves, move too fast with men, and talk to the media about their relationships. They aren’t mysterious and consistently end up with the short end of the stick. Their behavior smacks of desperation.
FM: What is key for a celebrity relationship working?
VT: Doing the opposite of what I said above.
FM: Out all of celebrities, who would you love to give advice to?
VT: Kim Kardashian. I believe she wants marriage and children but won’t get anything worthwhile if she continues on this path.